People say artists create the best works when they are heart-broken. I think it's quite true, looking at those great songs, poems, novels, paintings,... It's also said that when you are happy, you hear the rhythm of a song but when you are sad, you listen to the lyrics. 

I realized writings gave me certain relief. Lots of emotions are better crafted by written words; because sometimes, when you get caught up in your own fear, anger, anxiety,... you tend to rush into saying things that may hurt others. Unlike talking or messaging online, writing allows you to take more time to calm your mind, express yourself without feeling the urge to immediately reply. 

So, i hope 2016 is a year of more meaningful writing, not so much about sorrow but exploring ways to sooth our souls and have faith in life again.

source: Thought Catalog
author: Kencana Putri

When The One You Let Go Was The One

It is easy to love someone at their best. It is easy to love something that’s shiny. It is easy to give your best when you receive the same amount of efforts from the other parties. It is easy to stay beside someone with all the giggles and the fun.

It is easy to stay on the phone for hours with a person who watches movies with you, and talk about anything, everyday, until it’s become some kind of a ritual that you both do every night until one of you has fallen asleep.

It is easy to love someone with a perfect smile, it is so easy to fall in love with nose kisses and beard rash and that short little giggle that’s used only for you, and it’s so easy to fall in love with secret moments between the two of you, and to get so wrapped up in the world they share with you.

But a relationship is not always the rainbows and fireworks. We’re just humans. We’re not designed to be perfectly in a good mood and on our best behavior 24/7.

It is never about finding a perfect person to love. Because it is easy to fall in love with someone who puts up their best appearance like a wall, and behaves their best so they impress you. It is indeed easy to love them when it’s all about the laughs and the good times.

It is not about finding the prettiest, the strongest, the richest, nor the smartest — not even the most romantic ones who will throw a big gesture like what we’ve seen in all those Hollywood movies that thrive on grand gestures.

True love takes time to develop, several difficult times to see if the person we love stands by us, and a lot of understanding and respect. Attraction and infatuation are not love, no matter how much fairy dust is sprinkled on it to make you believe otherwise.

But deep down, we already knew what we truly need. Let me ask you a few questions,

Who’s going to love you and hold you when you’re at your worst?

Who’s going love you and give their best even when you hurt them so bad and you just don’t give as much as they do?

Who is always going to be there even without the regular talks and communications, but still manages to always know what to do when you break down and need support?

Who’s that one person who stays even when the times are hard?

Who’s that one person who stays after knowing the darkest, most embarrassing secret from your past that not even a single soul ever know before?

Who’s that one amazing person who stands so strong on their own and supports you to go after your dreams?

Who’s that one person who sees you breaking apart and pushes you so hard to get you back on your feet?

Who’s going to take care of you when you’re sick, and looking so horrible, and they still find you the most attractive human being on this earth?

Who’s that one amazing person who puts up such a fight and gives an enormous effort even when you don’t acknowledge them?

Who’s willing to stay awake at 3 am in the morning just so they can listen to all the things you need to talk about when you had a rough day?

And while you read this, who popped into your mind? You remember that person at this very moment, don’t you? You remember the time when you told them your secrets and how relieved you were when you did not see any judgment from their eyes. You remember your first date. The first time you told them that you love them, and the amazing feeling when they told you that they loved you, too. You remember the time they cried over you, and how you witnessed how sincere their love and affections for you were.

You remember giving them a list of reasons for why it would not work, and how they should find someone else. You remember giving them the reasons why they should just walk away. But they did not go anywhere, they told you that they don’t want anyone else and they refused to let go. But you let them go anyway. No one can do quite like they did, is that it? And you’re pretty sure that no one will ever love you the way they did, aren’t you?

We spend our lifetimes to find that one person, yet, as humans, we never really learn. We take those people who love us so unconditionally for granted after we found them. We wonder if we can find someone better, we get distracted by other people, and we get tired.

But we forget that there are a lot of people who are better than us, but they stayed. And often, after it’s already too late, we realize that we’ve lost a diamond while we’re so busy observing the other grey rocks.

But, we never really learned, did we?

I love thrift shopping when i was in England. There's something exciting about going through piles of old stuffs and discover some hidden gems. In Singapore, thrift stores are not so popular. The most notable place here is Salvation Army. I have never been to one before so this week, I decided to explore one of them. The one i chose to visit is Salvation Army Family Store at Upper Serangoon Road (just outside of Woodleigh MRT Station).

It was a raining day and I reached the place around 4pm. There is only one small pavement that leads to the main entrance and it was sunken in rain water.

The store is a 2-story old-looking building. It opens until 6pm daily.

On first floor, there were musical instruments, furnitures, household items and some clothing. The store is quite dim-lighted and old. I have already edited my pictures to look brighter here.

Clothes in this small room are on sale for $20 per kilograms. I didn't think i would want to buy 1kg of clothes so i just took a quick look here haha.

There are a lot of sections here, from paintings, kitchen appliances to stuff toys, jewelry, baby clothes, accessories, etc. On level 2, there are around 3 rooms filled with women clothes. They even have wedding gowns! (which looks quite creepy to me haha). The clothes here are not that cheap. Some are $10 - $15, some are more. I even found one Korean-made dress that is priced $150!! Either the tag was printed wrongly or it was a really expensive tag for thrift store clothing.

Nevertheless, nothing here interests me. Don't get me wrong, i'm a huge vintage lover and I did hope i could find something here to buy and contribute to charity; but i found nothing worth buying in the end.

However, it's the first Salvation Army i went to and there might be a better one. I searched online and they say the biggest thrift store in Singapore is at Upper Bukit Timah and it's called the Mega Store. Perhaps next time, i'll give that one a try.

Since i have some free time, i went outside more often.

Have you been to the new National Design Centre? (NDC) It's used to be that white building opposite Bras Bassah Complex. Check them out for exhibition and the Kapok shop (a Hong Kong based lifestyle and design boutique).

I went there briefly for a free talk on Creativity. Speaking of free talk, check out this app called Eventbrite for latest updates of events in town. I found out the talk from there.

At the same time, the students from NAFA department of Fashion was having their graduation show downstair.

After the talk, I passed by Kerbside food truck at Cathay to say hi to my bf. He was helping them raising fund for the movie "Chef". Their portobello mushroom burger was really good. 

Guess what, I discovered a new restaurant at the Cathay's basement! They sell Italian food at super affordable price. Things like baked rice or pasta for $5 - $7.

I was madly craving for steak for i don't know why. So i decided to order their Sirloin steak. The portion was average. And for the price of $11.90, i couldn't ask for much from their steak. It actually tasted like a grilled piece of meat. Definitely won't order this again. Aston is a much better choice.

That wraps up stuffs i did for start of June! Next week, i'm going to yoga classes. Will get more updates about it :D

Hi guys, as some of you might know, i left my full-time job 2 weeks ago. Long story short, i'm now having a lot of time in my hand and wondering what i can do.

I've been laying on bed whole day, just enjoying a day without rushing for deadlines and ignore Photoshop, Indesign or Illustrator. Being a designer is tough. I'm pretty much happy with this short break and have been catching up a lot of movies lately (a great example is "This is the end", a comedy by Seth Rogen, highly recommended!)

I'm thinking of doing something more fun and make use of my free time. For the moment i'm not sure what i will be yet but I figure that i can update my activities here. At least this place is quite private (i'm sure not a lot of people are reading this).

Although being positive, i only have around 2 months left to stay in Singapore if i can't find another full-time job. So, while actively searching for other jobs at the moment, I will spend some time to update this blog about my process in this 2 months.

This is kinda new and exciting to me. Since i have no idea where i will be in the next 2 months, everything will happen as a surprise.

So keep fighting and following me on this journey. At the end, i might or might not stay at Singapore any more but let's keep this journal as a wonderful memory and cherish every moments we have on Earth. This shall not be the end of a life-long learning journey!

Cheers

I spent that Thursday night crafting a hoped-to-be perfect good-bye. Day was long and dreading. Words are spoken. I finished the last sip of water in my favorite glass, turned it around and put it in my tote. Those keys sat quietly on the table. I ran out, and I was free.

these days all i can have is hope. for better days to come.

i'm sure you will be at a better place. i know you understand me and i know you won't condemn me like they do. have a good long sleep grandma.